I, the Necromancer


I rised from my sweet nightmares and got up, full of dark energy, ready for a new night. I went to the bath and threw some water on my face, to wash away the sleepiness. I looked in the mirror and saw the Abyss in my black eyes. My long brunette hair seemed less in the reflection, as a sign of my real age, and the color of silver was now populating my beard.

I felt incredibly hungry, as if no blood was running in my veins and my soul was fading away. I wore my black, medieval mantle and grabbed my huge scythe. I left my tower and went down towards the dungeons of Divinity’s Reach.

There, I unlocked the iron gate, that was standing in front of me, and approached an almost dead man.

The sound of my steps woke him up.

“Go away monster!” he yelled deeply frightened.

I laughed at him, in an evil way, and told: “Go to hell, you are not supposed to call me a monster…!”

Ι stared deep into his, touching his inner world. Anyone, could easily sense the fear that my presence had provoken to this scurvy soul. My mouth was wide open, ready to sink my fangs into his neck, like vampires do. I started to suck his blood, while he was screaming in pain.

“Too biter…! It tastes like shit dude…!”

I swallowed every bit of his blood and dragged his soul out of his almost dead corpse.

I summoned a minion rat and we went hunting in the twilight. We passed through a beautiful forest in Kryta. The cold wind was blowing away the leaves of the huge, ancient oak trees, that were around us. The full-moon was shining silver on the water of the emerald lakes.

After a while we came across a small colony of harpies village, hidden by the foliages of the maple trees and surrounded by falls.

I went close to the gate and ordered the minion rat to attack the flying guards.

Within a few minutes both of them were ravaged.


“Well done meat…!” I chucked his head, while praising him.

We stepped into the fortress and were immediately surrounded by an army of flying gay-fairies.

“Fuck… I was so sure that I didn’t alert them!”  I though, “Anyway, I can’t do anything more about it right now…”

I pulled my scythe out and cut about ten heads with it. They kept coming. I felt outnumbered, but did not give up. I stepped forward, gave them a big smile, and transformed myself into a Lich-demon.

“I will show you now, mother fuckers…!”

I threw some curses on them and ordered a horde of minion skeletons to slaughter them. When they were almost dead, I sucked their blood and took their souls. I ate like an Ettin and felt an overdose of energy, as if I had drunk ten red bulls at once.

Then I thought of sitting down and pray, like the saint I were.

I sacrificed a minion mole and draw a big circle with his blood.

I sat in that circle and began chanting the usual ceremony.

I called for two of my fellow Necromancers, in order to share their own experiences.

“You can’t even imagine what happened today…!” said Samuel.

“Brief me…” I said.


Necromancer Samuel walked thoughtless through the meadows of Ascalon, when suddenly a cannibal charr warrior came out of nowhere and tried to provoke him. He was spinning around like a ballerina while beating him with his axes.

“I will show you now, you adrenaline junkie…!”

Samuel was furious and entered the Death Shroud.

He dived into the Underworld and back again, fueled by demonic energy, and monstrously devoured the Warrior, who seemed to be undying.


He then pushed himself to remain in this in-between state, as long as he could bare. Suddenly two huge demon-wings grew from his back. He spread them wide open and flapped them in front of the Warrior’s face, who fell down and died like a helpless dog.

“Where are the wings? I can’t see anything!” I asked him full of curiosity.

“I have to be behind the Shroud, in order for them to appear!”

“So, what are you waiting for?”

“Leave me alone, I had a very difficult night…!”

“You are breaking my nerves…!”

“What are your news?” I turned to Nathanael

“You won’t believe it …”


Nathanael, the Necromancer, was swimming peacefully near the south-east coast of The Grove, when he suddenly felt a hand, grabbing his feet and dragging him down to the bottom.

Before he could actually react he found himself in the deeps of the sea floor. He looked behind him and saw a psychopathic sylvari Elementalist who was attacking him in the form of a tornado.

In order to encounter the upcoming danger, Nathanael transformed into a pathogenic cloud and suffocated the Elementalist with plague. The enemy turned green due to the pollution and rised a deadly fever.

“You gave the bastard what he deserved!… Anyway, I think it is time to stop joking, dawn’s coming…”

“Okay, see you later…”

“Bye bye”

“We’ll contact again tomorrow…”

Both Necromancers disappeared.

The sun made it’s appearance behind the mountains, as i was taking my way back home. After a while, I reached Divinity’s Reach and finally entered my tower.

I threw my scythe away and dropped the mantle on the floor. Relaxed, I lied down on my couch. Then, I put  the Twilight movie, the one with the sparkling vampire, on the DVD-player, and enjoyed every bit of it while eating my favorite pop corn.

– George Merkouris


Become one with your favorite Guild Wars 2 profession and describe us your day (or night). Try to write it down with humor, so that you can enjoy it even more.

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